Bottle of dicks.  I was working on this little “Chelios=Bareback Mountain=Can’t quit you” piece of shit when Puck Daddy’s Sean Leahy tweeted my nug and beat me to everything that is good in hockey blogging.  I said “fuck it”, I’ll run my piece even though my own cheese-ball reference to a shitty Ang Lee movie was thought of by everyone else.  Here she is in all her glory:

It appears as though Chris Chelios is set to sign with the Chicago Wolves of the AHL.  According to MLive via CBSSportsline.com, he’s skating on Monday and is reportedly “intending” to sign with the club next week.

I guess he still feels like “there’s something left in the tank”, I mean his face has always kind of reminded me of Stallone’s Rocky.  Still, I just can’t figure out why the three-time Stanley Cup Champion feels so compelled to keep playing hockey at the age of 47.

Mike Babcock and the Detroit Red Wings apparently offered Chelios an opportunity to skate with their club for the sake of “conditioning”, but are glad he’s gone wish him the best.

“Cheli’s a great guy. We’re all pulling for him here,” Babcock said.

There’s been very little noise made surrounding Sean Avery’s courtroom victory over Howard Berger in a libel suit relating to incidents from that fateful night in November, 2007.  The incident we’re referring to is the infamous pre-game scrum between crazy-eyes killah Darcy Tucker and douche extraordinaire Sean Avery that resulted after Avery tried to instigate Jason Blake.  Berger fabricated a story that Avery had made remarks to Blake regarding his recently diagnosed cancer.

There’s no one involved in this story that isn’t a little bit or a complete shitbag, so it’s not really that surprising that it’s being swept under a rug.  [He Score, He Shoot! for the photo]

Sweet Jesus Dany Heatley Is A Greasy Bastard:

Where Have I Seen This Before?

Don’t take this the wrong way, I love Puck Daddy, but those are the exact same pictures I posted here yesterday of big daddy Brian Burke and Phil Kessel.  Just sayin.

Kovalev Off On The Wrong Foot In Ottawa:

Having already told reporters this summer that he’d rather play in Montreal and that Ottawa was his last choice as a free agent, it’s hard to believe that Alex Kovalev could get in anymore trouble with his new Senators’ teammates.  Kovalev violated the locker room rules by walking across the Sens logo in the middle of the floor… in his skates.  Kovalev was fined $1000 for his actions.  Jason Spezza offered some support for his new teammate by saying; “It’s a good thing you’re rich.” (followed by several seizure-like psycho giggles).