Say what you will about the KHL, but I think it’d be fun as fuck to play there if I were a lazy NHL hockey player with a shitty attitude and no sense of “team”.  The conference finals of the Gagarin Cup, which sounds like something Wilt Chamberlain may have sipped from in Conan The Destroyer, are beginning tomorrow and are even going to be broadcast on ESPN 360.  So yo might as well grab some borscht and watch some highly skilled forwards mosey around some less than stellar defensemen.

Spartak Moscow’s Sergei Zinoviev provides the KHL’s must-see highlight of the week.  Give it a look, watch for the replay.  Scoring on your arse has a new poster boy, and his name is Sergei Zinoviev.

We All Combed Our Hair Like Marc Savard

Today in shameless cross-promotion comes Gunaxin’s Hockey Hair:  A Tribute To The Salad Skate.  A gallery of hockey players flaunting their feathers like only the warm-up skate would allow compiled by yours truly.  You’re not going to find a set of pictures with this many mullets, skullets, Kentucky waterfalls, gelmets, and faux-hawks anywhere.

The Penalty Shot That Never Was

In what might be one of the most bizarre on-ice occurrences this season, the Toronto Maple Leafs had a penalty shot wiped out after an officials’ review showed Pittsburgh’s Sergei Gonchar had scored on the previous play.  After the shot appeared to hit the crossbar, Alexei Ponikarovsky was sent in alone on a breakaway before being tripped up by Gonchar and awarded a penalty shot.  The shot never took place, and the ACC suits rained down the boos.  Must see video that ultimately declares the Leafs have no luck:

Oh How The Great Have Fallen

Stick-taps to SNY Rangers Blog for pointing this out:  former Rangers general manager Neil Smith has taken over coaching duties of the ECHL’s Johnstown Chiefs.  Smith was largely credited for putting together the New York Rangers 1994 Stanley Cup winning team.  Smith is also the owner of the Chiefs.

Leafs Losing Fans To Video Games, Twitter, Facebook, Etc.

Ugh, you’ve got to be fucking kidding me.  From the Toronto Star comes this feel-sorry-for-the-Leafs garbage about how young fans would rather be social media enthusiasts than watch a hockey game.  Calling potential fans “A youthful couch slouch who’d rather tweet, text, flirt on Facebook or, when it comes to hockey, get his NHL fix from video games”.  Well can you fucking blame them?  This team sucks a thousand lonely cocks, I’d rather be shitting.  Not to mention you could purchase Blackberry’s for all the children in Africa for the price of a Leafs’ ticket.

Nobody Does Bench-Clearing Brawls Like The Flyers Of Old

If you haven’t taken a few minutes to view the epic KHL brawl from the weekend, then you clearly haven’t lived.  Puck Daddy’s Dimitry Chesnokov has the fallout from the fight covered, and the video is viewable on just about every hockey blog there is.  We don’t get to see many bench-clearing brawls anymore, but this doozy from Russia certainly stirs up memories of a time when the Philadelphia Flyers wouldn’t think twice about it.  Look for the incredible mop on Mike Bossy’s head:

Via Fanball.com’s Owner’s Edge via Aaron Portzline of the Columbus Dispatch’s Twitter page:

Columbus Dispatch: Nikita FIlatov headed to KHL’s CSKA Moscow on one-year loan agreement.

According to TSN.ca (via RDS.ca), disgruntled and greedy Russian sniper prima donna Nikolai Zherdev has reportedly agreed to a deal with KHL club Salavatovo Yuleav Ufa.  SYU, as I will call it, is also home to other Russian shitbags Alexander Perezhogin and Alexander Radulov.

Zherdev once again showed flashes of superstar abilities with the New York Rangers last season, but disappeared when it mattered and was held pointless in seven playoff games.  The former 4th overall draft choice (Columbus, 2003) recently won his arbitration hearing with the Rangers, but was allowed to become a free-agent by the club after demanding a ludicrous amount of money.  Take a hike, Zherdev.