It was supposed to be a special night for Ken Hitchcock. Instead, his Columbus Blue Jackets ended up on the arse end of a 9-1 washing at home by the Detroit Red Wings. Ken’s 1000th game as an NHL head coach was over before his team ever had a chance.
In the continuous quest for good hockey, I often find myself watching Central Division games. Call me a Norris Division holdover, but it’s gotten even better since the Leafs were exiled and replaced by a couple of pretend teams in Columbus and Nashville. it helps that I’ve got a man-sized throbbing one for Rick Nash. I’m standing behind my prediction that Columbus will win the Central, for now.
Detroit Red Wings’ hockey is unbearably boring, even with all of that skill and scoring. Nobody has scored more goals on your way back from the bathroom in the last three seasons than the Detroit Red Wings. It took just a minute for them to get on the board tonight when Daniel Cleary potted one in the first period. Justin Abdelkader scored a couple, but I must have been grabbing a beer or possibly taking a shit. Land-fuck I can’t stand watching these guys play, but they’re incomparably good.
Even Todd Bertuzzi got in on the scoring tonight, along with six other Red Wings. One of the many things they did noticeably better tonight was move the puck through the neutral zone and carry it into the Columbus zone. It looked like the Blue Jackets’ defense was letting them walk in and take shots. Another precursor to their sounding victory was the removal of Chris Osgood from his goal-hole for Jimmy Howard. Howard made 25 saves, but wasn’t overly tested. He’ll do until Ken Holland makes a move for Martin Biron, Dwayne Roloson, or some other Essensa-esque stand-in.
They didn’t look old and they didn’t look tired. They looked like the Detroit Red Wings and they’ve got some winning to catch up on. Your team’s next.